Well....You Can Always Adopt

My husband and I have heard this time and time again during our now 21 month old all-out battle with fertility - as have most people who have publically acknowledged they've had trouble making a baby. Its as simple and obvious as that. Just press the "adoption" button (maybe Staples sells one next to their supply of "easy" buttons) and your set. I'd like to find the Adoption Button - the button that removes my desire for a child who shares my husband's red hair and my smattering of freckles, the button that fulfills my innate yearning to feel a baby growing inside me while sharing in the right of passage/the womanly badge of honor that is morning sickness and midnight cravings. Please point me in the direction of this magical button that instantly fills out mountains of paperwork and spits out the $20-40k needed to complete the adoption process. If such a button existed I think I would be able to understand this comment - "well, you can always adopt!" uttered so often by well-meaning fertile people to comfort those of us who've lost out in life's fertility lottery.

So obviously its the perfect thing to name this blog- a very personal account of my ongoing battle for fertility and possibly a journey into adoption. Maybe its my natural cinicism boosted and fed by 21 months of failing at something that should be so easy, failing though I'm doing everything "right" and working harder at it than the majority of the population. Maybe its because I want to claim the phrase in the name of infertility hopefully sucking away some of its power and removing "second best" implications the phrase bestows on the adoption process. Or maybe because on some level I feel like adoption is where my journey will ultimately end and I'll wind up wondering what took me so long to get there....